“Crashing the joint”

Films: Useless Humans (2020)

Alias: None

Type: Alien

Location: Civilized Area

Height/Weight: That of an average human.

Affiliation: Neutral

Summary: What a fitting title for a movie. Mankind is capable of grand feats, but at the same time, we tend to futz up at the worst times as well. To err is human, indeed.

History: One day, some slacker decided to get some of his old friends together for his 30th birthday party. But at the same time, something came from the stars. It is an alien that seems to be bent on the destruction of all mankind. Now, only these idiots are the ones who can stop it...wonderful.

Notable Kills: Nothing special.

Final Fate: After proving to be hard to kill, the alien is finally brought down when two of the friends take turns hacking it from in front and in behind. However, an agent it killed states that the device it planted into the ground was not a bomb, but a machine that would have cured global warming. By that point, there's little use crying over spilled blood.

Powers/Abilities: Aside from odd tech, this alien can teleport to get out of danger. Judging by what we see, though, it might actually just be zooming at the speed of light from one place to another.

Weakness: Anything conventional, though its teleportation powers can glitch up at times.

Scariness Factor: 3-Let's be honest, few will be too intimidated by this thing's Halloween costume-looking figure. That said, its eyes are mildly creepy, and its powers ensure an uneasy fight. Now if only communication wasn't so screwed up, this time around.

Trivia: -This film was made by Kinogo Pictures, which released "The Djinn" the following year.

-The alien was played by James Croak, who's more of a stunts man than an actor, judging by the majority of his career.


Image Gallery


Real good optics there, no?
YEEEP. We're screwed.
"Shut the fuck up, Garry, I'm taking your girlfriend."


Trailer(s)